By Nkem Ndem On the first day of November every…
This is the story of a man whose reaction to a failed paternity test is about to wreck his marriage, what advice do you have for him?
My wife and I have been married for 10 years. We met in college, and she has been my best friend for almost 14 years now. She is beautiful, supportive, kind, classy, and all around amazing as a wife.
We went through a really rough patch about a year ago, mostly due to issues on my end. However, she told me she was pregnant. I was overjoyed. She told me she would only keep it if I was 100% in on the baby and the marriage, I said I was fully committed, and we kept the baby.
As time went on, I became increasingly insecure about whether or not the baby was mine. I did the math and thought it was unlikely it was mine, on top of having a gut feeling. I was internally agonizing over this for months, and after the baby was born, I could barely even hold him because I was so convinced he wasn’t mine.
I told my wife I wanted a paternity test. She was upset but told me to get one if it would ease my mind. The test comes back two weeks later and it says I am not the father.
I’m absolutely livid. I had an out of body experience. I stormed into our house and just let loose. I felt like I couldn’t stop myself, I was completely broken in that moment. I cried and screamed and asked her what I did to deserve this. I absolutely never laid a hand on her.
The whole time, she’s just sitting on the couch, trying to comfort the baby. This made me even angrier for some reason, so I kicked her out right then and there. Told her to pack her bags and just get out.
She calls me the next day and tells me that I deserve to know that the baby is mine, and asks me to get a paternity test from another company. I figure I have nothing to lose at this point, and another paternity test can only help me in a divorce, so we get one at the company she suggested, and I sent a third to another company, just to be sure.
I get the results from one and they say I am the baby’s father. I wait a few days and don’t say anything, then get the second set of results, also confirming I’m the father. I feel like the weight of the world has just been lifted off my shoulders and I can finally be the dad I want to be.
I call my wife to give her the good news and she tells me she’s not moving back in. She says she’s disgusted with how I acted by asking for a paternity test and my reaction to the false one. She tells me I can come see my son, but she will be filing for divorce.
I don’t think my reaction was over the top for a man who thought he was being lied to about one of the most important things. I never showed any sort of violence and I was so emotionally broken at that point. I know how it must have looked to her, knowing that I was the father, but I don’t think she’s seeing it from my perspective. I’m planning on discussing it with her later and trying to convince her to work on it with me when I go see my son. AITA for reacting in this way to what I thought was an enormous deception?
Editor’s Note: This was posted on Reddit by a user.