Streets will be deserted, bustling communes will be quiet and…
By Adeniyi Emmanuel Bamgboye
Do you know you can spend just N20,000 on your wedding and still retain your champion as a perfect gentleman and in-law? Don’t worry, I am an accountant, I will give you a succinct breakdown.
Registry fee is within N12,000 - N14000 depending on the local government you wish to use. Let’s pick the upper range which is N14,000
Don’t go and buy egg roll. One is now N80. You know you cannot afford this; the best is to go for Ghanaian buns. One is N20 , you can buy it loju (at) dozen for discount sake. Buy 2 dozen because of the impromptu and accidental guests. That’s approximately N450. It could be lesser, if you can bargain well.
Buy a crate of 7up, not coke or Fanta. That’s N1,400
Budget N1,500 for cab transport. Uber is cheap. It’s your wedding day. You can’t afford to be a “trekkist” on that glorious day.
You don’t need a photographer. Use the camera on your phone. If you don’t have a camera phone, you can use your friend’s own.
To achieve all these, you have to make your wedding an alupaida (mystical) event. The one where your blurry wedding pictures will just surface magically online without you giving any of your friends prior notice. Some of them may be angry with you. Beg them well. They will understand.
Don’t bother about new clothes; wear what you have at home.
For your refreshment to be sufficient, make sure your guest list includes both parents (yours and hers), two of your friends who will also sign and act as witnesses and cameramen respectively.
In total, you have 10 guests including you and your wife. With this, the Ghanaian buns and 7up are likely to go round. You would even have more than sufficient for the court staff who are fond of doing “Atenu”
Back to my analysis. N14,000 + N450 + N1,400 + N1,500 equals N17,350.
With this, you will have N2, 650 as change. Use it to cook honeymoon Soup. Enjoy your life to the fullest with your wife.
Implement this religiously and thank me later.
Adeniyi Emmanuel Bamgboye is a chartered accountant and public affairs commentator.